They're sellin' razor blades and mirrors in the street

I guess I forgot about this outlet for a while. If a doctor were to tell me I had a tumour slightly larger than a cricket ball somewhere between my stomach and liver at the time of my last post, I'd have been devastated. When they did so last week it was the biggest relief of my life.

For months I've been getting bad reflux and indigestion and the doctors sent me for obscure tests, prescribed antibiotics and for the most part didn't seem interested. It took 4-6 weeks between tests because nobody had the time. Then 3 weeks ago today I got in for an ultrasound, I now presume it was for gallstones. Which were also found. However what was interesting was the other thing they found. An unidentifiable mass. I got the weekend to sweat it then a CT on the Monday which revealed it was an extremely large lymph node. Apparently the only realistic cause is lymphoma (a cancer). The other possibility according to the internet is AIDS. Although Lymphoma is most common to people in their 20's.

So that week I had to see an oncologist and a surgeon and I was admitted to hospital the following Monday (last week) to have it biopsied(as there are many different forms of Lymphoma). At this point I was aware that 80% of cases fall into one category which had roughly 50% chance of surviving 10 years, while the other 20% of cases had 92% chance of survival. At this point it was definitely lymphoma by all accounts. That works out to be less than 60% chance of survival based on what I knew at the time.

I put on a fairly brave face to the people I spoke to but in reality I had never been so scared. A very difficult thing to try to come to terms with.

So the tumour mentioned above has been the best news I could have received really. They misdiagnosis was because the kind of tumour they found is extremely rare. What are the odds?


Anyway I'm still sitting around at home since the fucker was in a bad spot and they had to slice me right open to get at it. Through a whole lot of stomach muscle too. Back in on the 4th of Jan to cut it out.

Making our way back from Mars

I feel like time is going so quickly lately. I haven't really been properly bored in so very long. Because with this Ph.D. I feel like I should constantly be doing something, so whenever I find myself just sitting with nothing to do I tend to appreciate it a whole lot more.

I'm already almost 4 months into it and feel like it's going absolutely nowhere. I'm not even remotely close to being able to do anything constructive. I just keep reading new stuff, and I've spend ages reading about something and trying to understand it, then got put onto something completely different and now I'm trying to learn and understand that.
I have however realised recently that I still remember stuff I learnt last year.

It's my birthday in a few days. I'm turning 23. Fuck.
I wish I had planned some kind of party but I don't have a venue that would be big enough for an awesome one and a small one would probably turn out average.

apt post

Well it seems like an apt time to update.

BOOBS on channel 9.

Hmmm, that's actually an unintentional segue onto something I was going to mention. I have been far too easily distracted lately. I kept ending up talking to people today whether it was on facebook or just people about the hallway. Mostly was people popping in my office though actually. Really did nothing today.

Back to not knowing what to do :S

Been a bit scattered lately too, like just dont quite feel all there. Hopefully thats just lack of sleep or something.

Still seeking independence. Going to investigate buying a studio apt. in a apt. building kinda thing.

Pearl Jam

Well Nat found the busking license application form. It costs $20 for a 2 month license or $50 for a 6 month one, who else want's to get one with me?

Also still advertising for a house-mate or two. Somewhere between Carrum and Dingley Village ideally.

Things are going well with Jo. Originally we were both quite hesitant about getting into something for different reasons and it just kinda happened and it's going well.

The official uni semester starts tomorrow so there'll be lots of undergrads roaming about again and I'll feel another year older when I see all the new first years walking around. I have two physics lab this week but after it I have to only take one of them because I'll be committed to 3 maths classes too. Lots of moneys! No time though :(

Less than 4 weeks til qld. I'm stoked. Better try to shape up a bit before walking around shirtless all weekend lol

I am now a member of...

Monash science society
Society of Physics, astronomy and maths
Chocolate club
Sri Lankan society
Philosophy club
Biomed society
Commerce
IT

Probably more

Not sick, not well

Caffeine withdrawal sucks...

It is currently 4:48pm and I'm borderline passing out. Trying to spend all day learning stuff really wears you out more than most people would believe. I've spent the better part of the day sitting on this very chair and I am completely rooted.

In other news I recommend that everybody googles the black hole information paradox. Very interesting stuff. And is still very much unresolved.

up and down and back again

Time seems to be passing so quickly atm, not sure why. Seems I failed at not going out midweek and wasted today as a result. Sigh.

Stoked about Queensland. Can't wait for it. It's gonna be awesome.

Seems semester is coming up, kinda looking forward to tutoring/demonstrating again. It seems I have 4 classes to teach this semester, gonna keep me really busy with PhD stuff too but lots of money, between scholarship and that I'll be getting around $700 in my account every week. Crazy.

Who wants to rent somewhere with me?


Things seem to be picking up with Jo, but I think everybody has noticed that anyway. Still not official, but if/when it is facebook will tell you all :P